Bullying, Decisions and Old School Solutions: Part II – Toronto Photographer

You are here because you probably read part one of my son’s  story “Bullying, Decisions and Old School Solutions…and if you didn’t…then please go back to do so. Just so you have an idea of what’s what.

You can read part one here.

What I did was sit down and think really hard about how to deal with this whole bully situation as a family and how to help my son deal with this issue along with what would benefit him the most, now and in the future.
While most parents do the best that they can for their children, there comes a time when you realize that your child may need someone from the outside.
Someone not a part of the family so to speak. Or maybe that someone is someones…such as a group of people.

I looked at my son and saw that he was floundering.
Hard.

And because I’m really not a kumbaya person…I started to Google various martial arts dojos.
I called a lot of different places, but nothing really clicked for me.

Then I called up a mixed martial arts dojo. I spoke with the manager there…Jessica, and she understood me. She totally got where I was coming from as a parent, when I sat there chatting her ear off about why I am looking for this for my kids.
We were invited to visit the next week.

Jessica made us feel very welcome.
We went over what is offered at the gym, and the benefits to our children. (Parents get perks there too!)

Needless to say we were so impressed, we signed them up…the same night.

First class came around and all the other kids and teachers made them feel welcome.
The teachers there are firm, kind, and very experienced.

The first week I saw my son get his smiles back.

The third week I saw that he was trying hard….and was more confident in himself.
The fifth week he learned that not trying doesn’t pay off.
The sixth and seventh week he earned his first belt and he learned that to earn a belt he had to work for it….and he was so proud  to have earned that belt!!
In his own words: “I think that this belt is going to be the most special. This belt made me realize that Marco was right. Belts are important, but learning is more important.

He started school on Tuesday. He was super excited to go and very happy to see all his friends that he hadn’t seen from over the summer.
He has a new aura of confidence about him . People see this. Children see this.
My son is back to how he used to be.
A confident, smiling, happy, go lucky child that is much loved.

As a parent I can teach my child many things.

I can teach them to respect others.
I can teach them to be good people and I can teach them much more.

Sometimes though, we need something or someone that is not within our circle to teach our children that little bit of extra…whatever it may be.

We found this little bit of extra at Revolution Mixed Martial Arts and Fitness.

I know that some people will say, “But you are teaching your child to be violent.”

NO. I am NOT.

A practitioner of martial arts recently wrote:
” My sensei always used to say ‘best self defence is not to be there.
Second best is to spot trouble and avoid it.
Third best is to diffuse the situation.
Only when all else fails should martial arts be needed!’

Another also sums it up quite nicely.

“… it teaches one the mental, verbal and physical self protection skills [needed] to deal with the one who never has had the benefit of such an education.”

As I said, I don’t do kumbaya when there is nothing being reciprocated.
When I see effort, and that a parent cares not just about their child but about mine also,  enough to want to sit down and find a solution…great.
We can pretty much fix whatever comes our way.

But when you as a parent have a laid back attitude and diminish what my child is going through…then I will empower my children to be able to find solutions on their own
and to not fit the cliche of ‘victim’ that has been assigned to them…due to policy.

So for all of you parents out there who would like to have their children be more confident and able to stand up for themselves, Revolution is having a FREE Bullying Seminar.
It is going to be held on Saturday September 13th from 10:30am-12pm.

You do need to register before hand.

Bullying in Schools

elena - this is such a great post to raise awareness!

Bullying, Decisions and Old School Solutions – Professional Photographer » merryfieldsphotography.com - […] « 6 Months Old Mr. { D } – Toronto Child Photographer Bullying, Decisions and Old School Solutions: Part II – Toronto Photographer » […]

Missy B - Great post, Martial Arts are a great way to empower kids, so glad you found something he loves!

Shuanna - What a great post!! I think it is so awesome that your son found a hobby that taught such great lessons and boosted his self confidence! Bullying is such a huge problem these days.

Kristy - What a great way to look at it…. “… it teaches one the mental, verbal and physical self protection skills [needed] to deal with the one who never has had the benefit of such an education.”

Michele - It’s great to hear about parents that care. Great information!

Lauren Weeks - I love that you sought out solutions. My son is three and I have often though lately about what I would do being in a situation where others were making him miserable. I also love that you’re admitting that you simply don’t know it all and that sometimes it takes a village, others to help us help our babies. Thanks for sharing your story!

geather - Sounds like a great event to raise awareness and help those who fall victim to bullying

Eden - I totally agree with your solution, Effie! I just signed my four year-old up for KungFu.

merryfields photography - Thanks for the kind comments everyone!

It is really hard seeing your child go through something like this. To say that I was happy with the decision we made would be such an understatement!!

Sometimes we as parents have to admit that we don’t know everything in order to get the help we need.

That being said, I found what worked for me and my family. Everyone will make their own choices and their own decisions.

Revolution MMA Kids BJJ Competition – Toronto, Ontario, Professional Photographer » merryfieldsphotography.com - […] The story can be read here: Bullying, Decisions and Old School Solutions and my solution can be read here: Bullying, Decisions and Old School Solutions II […]

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